About Love and Other Vices

In the era of fast communication and social media, love seems to have lost ground in the face of vanity and appearances. Somehow it becomes socially acceptable to trade happiness for the perfect shot, but at what cost?

John Milton: Vanity, definitely my favorite sin. –  The Devil’s Advocate

Vanity in Budapest

Looking for love is hard, always has been, at least for most of us. I know there are a special few that were lucky enough to find the love of their life from the first shot, but for the majority of us, finding that special someone meant lots of heartaches. Unfortunately, the modern inventions aren’t working in our favor and from my perspective is only putting more pressure on us.

The idea of that power couple that always looks flawless in pictures with the matching outfit is hunting most of us. Clearly, we all want to be Brad and Angelina on the red carpet, but can we all be “picture-perfect couple”? Furthermore, we all saw what happened to Brangelina, so looking perfect didn’t work in their favor either.

In the era of Tinder and other matching applications; Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat, only to name a few social media ones, it is far more important to look happy, accomplished or stylish than to actually be happy. We have the perfect life displayed on our accounts, but how much of that is real and how much is just a “perfect” capture?

Clearly, we don’t want to show the world how our hair looks on a bad day or that we are suffering from a bad breakup, but the obsession with perfection made us distant and colder. It is as if we want to display only a side of ourselves, the pretty one, but we are afraid to let people in and see us for what we truly are, which is far from the perfection we present on social media.

Perhaps it is only my personal opinion, but to be fully accomplished means to have that special someone by your side, to share all the beautiful moments with him/her, to cheer up when you see their face and to want to make them happy. Most of these feelings will never be caught on camera and we should never even try to catch them, these should never leave the privacy of our houses/beds.

Many relationships these days end when they should have just begun, either because we formed an opinion of the other person when we browse their online profiles and that is far from the offline reality or because we don’t want to settle for something less than extraordinary when it comes to love. We want the picture-perfect couple idea, we want to be the true power couple that everyone says they are so beautiful and perfect together, but we forget that the idea of the power couple is not based on looks but on having each other back and helping each other grow.

Looks aren’t everything and vanity should never have priority over happiness, it is OK not to be perfect, nor to have the ideal house/car/boyfriend. What is not OK is to be unhappy and alone, because you set impossible to accomplish standards.

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